yesterday < MY birthday~

yesterday morning, i wake up early..cox i was excited for my birthday...

I thot they are many ppl will say happy birthday to me.. so , i open facebook...

den look... got abit disappointed.. cox they are a few only.. + i dun knew who they are...
but i still feel thank about their word..

my frenz..
1 oso dun hav... maybe still early ,they havent wake up yet...
i think ,so i close the pc then do smtg like everyday i do...

b4 12p.m i wan to go out wif my frenz , my mum dun let cox she say she ask the god about my fate of 2010...

fortune teller tell her , my luck was bad in 2010.. and i cant celebrate my b'day , my frenz b'day n smtg... cox it will bring harm to me.. and that is my fate...

so my mum dun let me out .. den i dun care the prevent from her... and go out ...

i arrive mid-valley... but my frenz havent come yet.. he sms me say.. the bus that he take was spoiled.. then he take motor to come m-v..
on route , he saw an accident , so he bring the victim to hospital.. the process is taking about 2hour...

i trust him cox i know who he is... he is a nice guy ..

b4 he come to m-v , i remember my mum's word, celebrate my b'day will bring harm...
so i go back home b4 he come... when he arrive , i tell him to play wif his friend ,cox his freind came wif him...and no nid to care about me... he say appologize...and i was forgive him...

cox i dun wan bring harm to him... the person who wan to celebrate my b'day...
I'm fell sad cox i was be resigned to one's fate...

at home, i help my dad for his work... then i look the facebook... dun have any 1 of my frenz left their blessings to me... haiz.. why i so kan jeong about this? cox of i feel lonely ?
ya, i feel lonely ,sad and disappointed..

when 5p.m , chio yee send sms to me... ask me wan go to church anot..
i was lonely , so of cox i wan to go ....

the church have transport to bring me go to the church..
i wait from 7p.m until 7.40+p.m , the transport finally come..
but in the waiting process , my mind was tell me , dun go and dun wait anymore... cox my dad nid my help ...
but i promise chio yee, i will go and plz come for fetch me.. so i still wait...

den ... i blur blur in the church cox i dun knw i was became a Christian... huh? wat ?
david(my captain i think..) tell me that the process he become a Christian... he oso same like me blur blur at 1st ,dun know why he in jor...haha
then blak blak blak...

finally, can go back le... i thot my b'day past like that only without b'day cake and present...
N my hope from max100 become to max20 b4 i come to the church , cox no hope no disappointed... so i lower my wish of my b'day..

suddenly.. i hear got ppl singing b'day song , so i find the ppl who was b'day..(blur ing)
i dint find 1 ppl that b'day today... then i saw they are looking on me..
i was surprised cox how they knw today is my b'day... n it was me... they are singing for me T~T

then a b'day cake taking out by david.. i dun knw the cake got write my name anot , cox my soul already flying out jor , haha~
they bless me and wish me happy b'day..

suddenly i feel very happy ... and my sadness ,lonelyn disappointed are gone... cox i really happy~ ^^
then chio yee give me a b'day present... T~T ,TQ~

em.. ok , talk about the cake... it was a cheese cake.. is my favourite type...^^ n very delicious~
I LIKE IT~ ^^

b4 that, i think ... if i still in m-v , i can play wif my frenz in karaok and cinema... but i will not going to the church...

so i think the sadness,lonely and disappointed b4 are worth ,cox...
if i play wif my frenz, i cant be a christian.. and i cant get a b'day cake and present...

thank Q to the the ppl that prepare this surprise for me ^^,although v juz 1st time to know each other ,n i still cant remember their name... haha xp

maybe this is the god give me d , he give me the best and the rite thing to me on the rite time...
he give me the joyness that let me cant sleep in that niteT~T , but i still happy ...

i was grateful to the god , my dearest jesus...
thank you... cox u give me a nice memories and experience on my 17th birthday...

thank you ...T~T i will be UR loyalty believer from now... AMEN...

like a nightmare...

Everynite , i dream about my school, the SPM exam , my classmate and oso my primary school classmate...

ya... is everynite.. everytime i dream , it was at unsame place wif unsame character... but all of them i knew... etc, chio yee, bee eng , afdal , fong yee , keat fei , my primary school teacher , my high school teacher , mui hong , and many many....

it make me feel i still study at school... not yet end of school life... but i dislike this feeling , cox after i wake .... i strongly feel that i was left the school and cant go back already... and i'm lonely...

after that last day of SPM exam... i thot i was free and i will be happier than b4... but i wrong , cox everything are not same like my thinking... i thot keat fei will find me for play or go some place for fun... i thot some body will on9 can 1on 1 me in dota... i thot i was release the preasure that i feel strongly in school... i thot i will be more happy ...

but now... i was more lonely.. everyday work is helping my parents to reduce their work... everyday, play 3 hr pc that waiting some ppl comment me on facebook... everyday think wat my frenz doing juz nw? am i too lazy to find work or go to the open day of the collage? everyday over so fast... chistmas is coming soon ... 2 more day... my birthday is coming soon... 8 more day... the day of go to sabah alone is coming soon... 11 more day...

i was act like ntg happen in these day... cox i dunno have to do wat ... n wat i can do nw only 1 ...

wait... wait the day over... and go to sabah... maybe i will get some new frenz there or be more happier than nw ^^

hope i wont dream about school life today... cox i dun wan it to remind me ...i was out from school.. school life is a nice dream b4... but now like a nightmare... and i scare to dream again and again.. nw.. cox it make me feel pain ... and already feel sad about during school day ...

sad... T~T

after Spm(now), i ....

so dissappointed... wtf...
1. all ppl say nxt year go karaok.. this year , they are busy for the future...zzz

2.PLKN... no~~ i am the 1of 1st group~ and I will go to the Sabah at 2 jan 2010~ no~~~T~T

3.my valentine day and chinese new year.... have to celebrate at camp...T~T

4.haiz.... i cant help my family to do family job cox of PLKN... my 5k++ bye~T~T

too sad jor... I wan to cry now... T~T wuu~ wuu~~ wuuu~~~